Families Show Appreciation with a Surprise Mural

On June 11, on what was many staff members' last day before summer break, they were greeted by a beautiful painting on the fence at the top of the front stairs. It features a vibrant rainbow, some playful art by young students, a few dozen little handprints, and a message of appreciation:

Thank you, Meher Schools Staff!

❤️ 2020-2021 families

Without the knowledge of the teachers (though they did get approval from the administration!) a group of parents and children had been there the night before, painting well into the evening. The project was spearheaded by Meher Schools dad George Peridas, who wrote to his fellow parents:

"Through supreme organization, dogged determination, sheer hard work, and the never-faltering Meher positive attitude, our school managed to obtain permission to stay open for those children who were able to attend in person, and to provide top-notch remote schooling for those who could not – all virtually without breaking stride.

"I, for one, feel an enormous amount of gratitude and admiration toward our teachers and management for having pulled off this feat. Not only did they put their necks on the line by being in class every day, they worked long hours and off the beaten path to set up new systems, record instructional videos, and keep track of children's progress.

"What better way to express our gratitude toward the school in a heartfelt and enduring way than through art?!"

And what a sweet expression of gratitude it is!

Nothing More Important

One evening I arrived punctually at an editor’s house to talk about a manuscript. “I’ll be a few minutes,” she said as she opened the door. “I’m having a conversation with my daughter.” I sat on the couch in the living room to wait. I could see her sitting at the dining room table talking with a blond girl around eleven years old. The girl was speaking in a hesitant, but urgent, way while the mom leaned toward her, as if she wanted to catch every word. It was the kind of listening I had rarely witnessed.

I was struck by the expression on the mother’s face. There was no sense of time pressure or hurrying, even though she had a guest. I could see that she was checking in on her daughter’s emotions as she encouraged her to continue. If I could have interpreted her nonverbal cues, the message would be “You can tell me anything, and I will still love you just as much. There is nothing more important to me than hearing you.”

Children’s feelings often seem silly to our adult minds. (“Why would you be upset about that?”) In addition, they often choose the most inopportune times to talk. We have a colleague waiting. We have to be somewhere in five minutes.

Yet the importance of stopping to give our full attention to children was highlighted in a film called The Joy of Parenting that I saw about a decade ago. It was made by Dr. John Gottman, one of the preeminent researchers in relationship health. The movie shows parents interrupting their activities to listen to children when they are trying to express some feelings. It highlights the landmark findings of Dr. Gottman’s research on parent-child interactions.

He found when adults took the time to stop, listen to, and validate children’s emotions, the result was less stress hormones in their bloodstreams – not just when they had an adult’s attention, but all the time. Dr. Gottman’s clinical findings indicate the need for a new priority: understanding that hearing what children are saying is just as important as everything else we do.

The editor I observed was teaching her daughter, in that five-minute conversation, that she was worthy of being heard. Having the ear of her parents and teachers, the girl will be more likely to speak up in other situations, to listen to her own inner voice, to have confidence in her own knowing.

Graduation 2021

A new world calls across the ocean A new world calls across the sky A new world whispers in the shadows Time to fly, time to fly...

With the song “A New World” by Jason Robert Brown, chorus director and first grade teacher Laura White opened our graduation ceremony for the Class of 2021 Friday, launching our 11 fifth graders on their journey into “a new world.”

The ceremony took place at dusk at the stage on the playground, with families seated six feet apart on the benches. Marking each family’s place was a portrait of their graduating child drawn by Warren Wallace, who does the illustrations for Susie Kohl’s Wednesday Messages “Parenting From the Heart” column.

After Laura’s song, the graduating fifth graders filed into seats on and next to the stage. Before they were presented, two of them gave speeches describing what the school had meant to them. (One of the others gave a speech midway through the ceremony.)

Next, Co-Principal Vince d’Assis or Ivy Summers read a poem written by one of the fifth grade teachers describing what is special about each student, and the student picked up a large, colorfully decorated gift, then joined their family on the benches. Fifth grade teachers Joseph Schneider and Terry Johnson stood to the side of the stage, placing each graduate’s gift on a pedestal as his or her name was called.

When the last student had received his gift, it was time for the much-anticipated premiere of the film of fifth grade play, a condensed version of Shakespeare’s A Midsummer Night’s Dream, which the class had been working on for two months.

The class’s final year at Meher School was “a new world” in its own right – a world of remote, hybrid, and in-person learning, of handwashing and Purell, of facemasks, social distancing, and daily health checks.

COVID cast its shadow over graduation too. Missing were the hug or handshake each graduate traditionally receives from their teachers and the co-principals when they receive their gifts and the tearful good-bye hugs following the ceremony. Many of the students had been together since preschool, and the class had become like a second family to them.

By the time the video ended, it was dark, and for the Class of 2021 it was, in the words of Laura’s song,

Time to fly, time to fly...