"Latinx": All Under the Same Roof

Juan is a Meher Schools parent and member of the Equity & Inclusion Committee.

For the first time after many years of embracing, celebrating, and working in and for the U.S. Hispanic media market, I am using this space to share what I have learned from my heritage.

Growing up in the U.S. as a young adult and through my mid-adulthood years, I thought the word “Hispanic” fully and inclusively described us, those born in Latin American countries. However, some people are now adopting a better term, “Latinx,” a word that not only describes heritage but successfully includes race, nationality, religion, and gender identity.

There isn’t a better way to celebrate the complexity of the Latino heritage during Hispanic / Latinx Heritage Month than by talking about what the word Latinx means and why it transcends all conceivable borders. Whoa! “Borders” . . . stay with me.

By border I’m not only suggesting the most common physical definition when thinking about Latinos, Latinas, and “Latines” in the U.S., but instead I’m using the word to describe everything that separates us from the rest, from the “mainstream.” Such borders are those delineated by race, nationality, religion, and gender.

So what is Latinx?

There isn’t an official scholar or academic definition of this word available anywhere, but that is where the word hides all its potential. The unofficial definition gives the term flexibility and fluidity to embrace a single community made out of multiple factors.

The term Latinx (la-teen-ex) was introduced in the early 2000s in the U.S. as a gender-neutral term for Latino / Latina. The idea was to include those outside the gender binary, such as transgender or gender-fluid individuals. The Latin LGBTQ+ communities have embraced the term because Spanish is a gendered language, and using x to neutralize gender takes care of this challenge in English. Similar to using e in Spanish when saying Latine.

Beyond being inclusive of gender, Latinx describes people who don’t speak Spanish but whose roots are Latin American, such as Brazilians, Haitians, and indigenous Latin Americans. Additionally, Latinx embraces first-, second-, and third-generation Americans who don’t speak Spanish and are mixed-race, but whose culture is as Latin as mine or as a Cuban Son.

In other words, Latinx stands for everyone who has felt left out in the Latino, Latina, Latine communities, and its objective is to make everyone count.

Lastly, Latinx debunks the “bad hombres” definition once given to Hispanics. Our abuelos (grandparents) are not all from the same continent; our political views are not all the same; we have every skin color available in the human color scheme; we are not all from the same country; our prayers are not addressed to the same-named God; and, certainly, our Latinx cultures are unquestionably greater than one language.

Let’s celebrate this month the heritage, race, nationality, gender, and virtues of those Hispanics / Latinos / Latinas / Latines that live under the same roof of the term Latinx.

Meet Our Nurtured Heart Trainers: Caryl Morton

This is the second in a series about our Nurtured Heart Approach trainers who work at The Meher Schools.

"My dedication to using the Nurtured Heart Approach is just as much for my growth as for the children,” says Room 8 kindergarten teacher Caryl Morton, one of three certified Nurtured Heart trainers on our staff. “It allows me to accept my mistakes, just as it allows that in children. If ever I respond to a child with irritation or impatience, Nurtured Heart has taught me how to quickly turn that around into something positive and loving.”

Caryl was introduced to the Nurtured Heart Approach in 2003, when the program’s founder, Howard Glasser, gave a workshop at our school. “His talk was inspiring, and I wanted to learn more.”

We’re nourishing the child in ways that help them become who they are.

People often think of the Nurtured Heart Approach in terms of altering children’s behavior, but it’s more than that, Caryl notes. ”Behavior can change as a side benefit, but something much deeper is going on. Every time we respond to behavior in the Nurtured Heart way – giving no energy to the negative and tons of energy to the positive – we’re nourishing the child in ways that help them become who they are. None of our effort is lost, even if changes in behavior come slowly.”

In her classroom, “we’re always looking for ways to offer these bits of ‘nourishment,’ often during our gem jar time. We highlight different children, naming great qualities we’ve observed in them that day. Then they get to put a gem in the jar. Another sweet consequence of this is that the children also begin to contribute to this discussion. They offer gems to other children and remark on something positive they’ve noticed. They’re quick to notice kindness, generosity, and cooperation in their classmates.”

Caryl has taught in our kindergarten for 17 years. She became a Nurtured Heart trainer in 2012. In that role, she has given talks at staff meetings, assisted in presentations to parents, and consulted with parents.

Harmonious Resolutions

“I know my voice can sound a little intense sometimes when I’m under stress, so I try to tune in to the way I sound with my co-workers,” one of our preschool teachers says. She makes a point of apologizing if her tone sounds harsh. This awareness is extremely important in our school environment, where our teaching teams are role models for harmonious ways of working together. We can’t ask students to cooperate and speak kindly to each other if they see adults reacting to each other in disrespectful ways.

Teachers are also charged with making classrooms feel safe. That doesn’t mean that adults never have a conflict. It’s helpful to children to witness disagreements that are handled civilly, as long as they get to see the conflict being resolved. Adverse reactions occur when there is no reconciliation.

Mindful disagreements at any age can teach problem solving, empathy, and compromise, as long as people modulate their emotions and their words. Children need practice to learn how to debate an issue in a moderate way, and teachers often coach children in resolving conflicts.

Adults can set ground rules for keeping arguments respectful and safe. At school we have rules about not calling names or teasing someone, and certainly no physical aggression. At home, parents might bring up rules for handling disagreements and talk about how people can make amends if they hurt someone’s feelings.

These principles also hold in conflicts between adults and children. John Gottman, PhD, an expert in marital relations and stress reduction in children, warns about the problems of a “harsh start-up,” saying things like “Why would you do that?” We want children to feel safe expressing their feelings and explaining their motivations, an important part of a productive disagreement. The way we start and end disagreements is important.

The idea of making sure conflicts end with a reconciliation often comes into play before children get to school. A child who arrives at school after an unresolved argument may feel anxious all day.

Let’s help our children believe in the possibilities of working out problems and believe that even though problem solving and collaboration take more work, they are definitely worth the effort.